Slowly, slowly, we are moving out of crisis mode and into something different: not stasis, exactly, but something more like accommodation. Isaac goes to school willingly, insisting every morning that it won't be loud. We talk about what might happen, and I can feel him shrink from the possibility of unexpected noise, rejecting even the possibility that school might be too much input for him today.
And he processes the possibilities of the day in his own recursive way, like a tide coming in bit by bit, withdrawing and then inching a little further into the shoreline.
There still isn't enough support, but they're trying. It's a slow dance, tidal also in its own way.
We sat in bed tonight as Isaac read his first real book independently. He's read the words of Hop on Pop, but now he's reading Mo Willems' My Friend is Sad and we can see him enjoying not only the accomplishment of reading, but also the meaning in the book. It's funny: there was a school fundraiser, and each child was encouraged to choose three books from a catalog: Isaac's choices: a Spongebob book, something else and this.
It's perfecty calibrated to his reading and comprehension level now: not too many words on the page, doable without being too easy, with a little humor and nuance to keep him engaged in the challenge of making meaning from it. He's not all the way there: I can see him shoot by the pictures to find the next word, but he gets some of it: that the elephant is sad, that his friend is trying to make him happy. It's a great start, and we're happy that he can decode what's on the page, but far more excited that there's clearly comprehension there, and pride.
And J's joy in seeing his son warm to reading is beautiful to behold.
Isaac's picking up a lot of language at school these days: some random, and some quite comically appropriate. "Mommy, stop arguing," he told me this morning as I fought him to get his shoes and socks on. And, the other day, as I tried to--as the DIR people say--"playfully obstruct" him out of a mood, "Oh, just stop."
And guess what? I have a shiner.
Yep, a real, old-fashioned shiner. I expect it'll be quite spectacular in the morning. Got home tonight, boot somehow slid on kitchen floor and I went face-first (cheekbone first, actually) into the door frame. No amount of makeup is going to cover it. I can already imagine the looks I'm going to get for the next several days.
We scrapped Halloween plans (Isaac's not that into it anyway), and hunkered down tonight. I napped while the boys ran out for dal and tandoori.
Tomorrow, open studios, a trip to the bookstore and date night. I wonder if I can keep my sunglasses on in the restaurant?
Oh no! A shiner? You must invent the most outrageous story for anyone who asks. (Though the truth is pretty outstanding all on its own, don't you think?)
And dear Isaac. No longer in crisis mode is good. Hopefully it will be even better soon. Sending hugs.
Posted by: kristen | November 01, 2008 at 04:20 AM
You're funny. And I absolutely love hearing about I's progress on the reading front. How amazing for him and for you all. Rock on!
Posted by: Special Needs Mama | November 01, 2008 at 07:07 AM
Ok, I'm just twisted enough to want to see that shiner! (I'll show you my bruise from Nik's bite this morning...)
How is that, just when I am at my nadir, I read your words and feel hope again? Thank you.
And Isaac? A superstar. Bless him but he is trying so hard and achieving so much. Imagine what's possible with the right supports in place?
Posted by: Niksmom | November 01, 2008 at 09:03 AM
I know that you're a professional blogger and all, but you're doing it wrong.
When you hurt yourself comically that goes on Twitter.
http://twitter.com/cjereneta/statuses/817044070
http://twitter.com/cjereneta/statuses/795524450
http://twitter.com/cjereneta/statuses/785253194
Posted by: Chris | November 01, 2008 at 09:35 AM
Ack, a shiner?!? Yikes. You ARE going to get some looks and some "yeah right" glances if you even tell that story. Damn, that must've hurt.
Dal and tandoori? And you STAYED HOME??? I hope they brought you some.
Posted by: Emily | November 01, 2008 at 11:23 AM
I love this, Susan. You guys must be so proud of Isaac's reading because I know that I am!
And Chris' comment above: hilarious!
Posted by: Jordan | November 02, 2008 at 02:19 PM
Erase paste from Benefit?
Posted by: drama mama | November 02, 2008 at 09:14 PM
Hey, I saw Isaac on Halloween during the parade, hand in hand with Bernie the Wonder Para. He was coping and doing OK. Even when they had to bring the parade inside because it was raining. Call for deets. xo. nice shiner!
Posted by: rachel | November 03, 2008 at 07:30 PM