Way back when we were first wading through therapies and diagnoses and endlessly picking little laminated icons off the floor, I remember thinking how overwhelmed and exhausted we felt every time someone suggested something new.
PECS never sat well with us, in retrospect, I think, because so many of Isaac's auditory processing challenges are situational. That is to say, his receptive language is fine at home and in quiet places, while he has a much harder time in loud, chaotic environments or when he's upset. So while it may have been essential for the classroom, it usually felt unnatural--and like overkill--at home.
The truth is we resisted a lot of suggestions at first but ended up trying just about everything sooner or later. I remember saying snidely to J. one day that developmental pediatricians should hand out two things to newly-diagnosed parents on the way out of the office: a prescription for antidepressants and a lamination machine.
Because if you are a parent of the child on the spectrum, there is only one absolute truth: everything having to do with autism must be laminated.
Social stories, while they seemed really smart in theory, seemed overwhelming in practice. Find images that your child can relate to, add text to them, bind them together and...what? A book every time we need to do something new? It's enough to make you want to stay inside all day and bolt the door.
We're way past that now, and I have enough perspective to see that, without really noticing, we now weave social stories into pretty much everything we do. Isaac loves and responds to them, and we rarely if ever need pictures anymore to reinforce the story. He likes to hear them, embroider them, add silly variations. He asks for them when he's upset or nervous or excited, and he sometimes even tells them himself. It's as natural as conversation, if conversation were, in fact, natural.
But there's another piece here too. Isaac loves our family photo albums. When he was a baby, I remember seeing a craft project in one of the parenting magazines (inspiring in that Martha Stewart way: impressive, while leaving you with the vague sense that you have failed as a parent, even before you've started). It involved making a mobile out of photos so your little darling could go to sleep with the faces of beloved family members dangling overhead. I never made that mobile, but I did go out and get a bunch of little brag books, which I brought to work in the days after I returned to work to try to retain some continuity with my new, and still unfamiliar, mother self.
Isaac has discovered and fallen in love with these books, and he takes great pleasure in pointing out the pictures of "Baby Isaac," Mommy, Daddy, and his grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins. To this we have added pictures from school for a bit of social reinforcement.
"Who's this?" I asked the other day as we looked at a picture from last year's preschool class. "That's Andrew!" he told me excitedly. "And this?" I said, pointing to another child. "That's Andrew!"
"Really, Isaac," I asked. "Are ALL the kids in your class named Andrew?" I pointed to each one in turn. "Andrew, Andrew, Andrew, Andrew and Andrew?"
He laughed so hard he started to hiccup, and since then he has insisted that we refer to him as Andrew.
"Isaac, it's time for bed," I said tonight.
"ANDREW it's time for bed," he replied calmly, grinning at me sidelong: his father's grin.
So I complied, marveling at how a simple story about going to school has meandered its way into a game of pretend, and how right it is that he is now becoming interested in exploring the meanings of routine and friendship and family and identity.
Too funny! Isaac, I mean ANDREW, has such a great sense of humor.
I especially laughed about the laminating machine. We just bought one last week! :-p
Posted by: Niksmom | January 27, 2009 at 10:15 AM
That's our boy!
F*ck that laminating business. We just acted everything out in our living room.
Posted by: drama mama | January 27, 2009 at 06:24 PM
Oh, God, you are right on about the laminating - what is that all about? We seem to have one staff member laminating something at work at all times, I swear.
Lovely post! Andrew sure is growing up.
Posted by: Jordan Sadler, SLP | January 27, 2009 at 06:33 PM
Antidepressants and a laminating machine ... sheer brilliance! Love that!
Posted by: Betty and Boo's Mommy | January 27, 2009 at 06:55 PM
Ah yes, doing the lamination thing here too. Photos, lots of laminated photos. And the velcro -- just recently read another comment on another board to the effect that if you want a new symbol for an autism bumpersticker, she'd nominate velcro as an image!
RRRRRIP goes the velcro...
(By the way, I've lurked for a while but don't think I've commented before. Hi, I'm JoyMama from Elvis Sightings.)
Posted by: JoyMama | January 28, 2009 at 07:59 AM
Hi Susan, I have taken to reading your blogs as I try to de-stress in the evening sometimes. It may seem a strange form of stress reduction to you. But there is something so lovely in your stories, so loving. And I get to connect with three people I care about! Thank you. And say hi to Andrew for me.
Posted by: Leslie | January 30, 2009 at 09:59 PM
What a child is this?
Posted by: celebrity tube | December 17, 2009 at 02:39 PM